What do we seek in silence and solitude?

First, we seek self-knowledge and self-acceptance, to know and nurture ourselves, for "only in still water do we see our reflection."

Henri Nouwen writes: "The greatest gift of solitude…is the gift of a new self… In solitude we discover our true nature, our true self, our true identity. The first thing we often discover in solitude is our own restlessness, our drivenness and compulsiveness, our urge to act quickly, to make an impact, and to have influence; and often we find it very hard to withstand the temptation to return as quickly as possible to the world of 'relevance.' But when we persevere…we slowly come to hear the still, small voice and feel the gentle breeze, and so come to know the Lord our our heart, soul, and mind, the Lord who makes us see who we really are."

Second, we seek to deepen intimacy. You can have only as much connection with others as you have with yourself. You will experience others the way you experience yourself in solitude. Do you trust yourself? Do you find yourself lovable? real? equal? a source of comfort? If so, then you will trust others as well; you will find them lovable, real and comforting too.

Henri Nouwen again: "That knowledge of who we really are allows us to live and work in community. As long as our life and work together are based on a false or distorted self-understanding, we are bound to become entangled in interpersonal conflicts and to lose perspective on our common task."

Third, we seek to know God.

Listen once again to Henri Nouwen: "Solitude is the place where God reveals himself as God-with-us…, as the God who is the source, the center and the purpose of our existence, as the God who wants to give himself to us with an unconditional, unlimited, and unrestrained love… Solitude indeed is the place of the great encounter, from which all other encounters derive their meaning. In solitude, we meet God. In solitude, we leave behind our many activities, concerns, plans and projects, opinions and convictions, and enter into the presence of our loving God, naked, vulnerable, open and receptive."

Is that what I truly want?

Text and image © 2010 by Dirk deVries. All rights reserved.