Loss
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An Unfinished Life
"Each of us leaves an unfinished life," says poet Mary Oliver. It is possible not to? Is it possible to live so fully, so richly, so completely that you exit exhaling, "That's it, then, once this mug goes back in… Continue reading
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Blessing Tree
In 2002, the Christmas after my mom died (two years after my dad died and four years after my sister died), I did something uncharacteristically Dirk; I decorated my tree in stages: I assembled it one night, then put the… Continue reading
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Stripping
Oh, you of the sacred plaid,and you of the holy stripes,you of the divine argyles and polka dots,you pinstripe believers and houndstooth congregants…it's time to strip clean. Leave your garments beside the door;exit your particular, peculiar house of worship. Out… Continue reading
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Core Word #3: Expansion
As I've grown spiritually (and I do think of it as growth, though maybe it's change, or evolution, or devolution–in any case, because it gets better and better, I experience it as growth), it feels, even when I'm letting go… Continue reading
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Unselfing
If it unselfs you,treasure it,cultivate it. If it muscles through your grim, monotonous monitoringof what others think of youor whether or not you measure up,make a note. If it picks you up,shakes you out,and drops you a few feet away… Continue reading
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Falling Apart, Coming Back Together
Disintegration leads to reintegration. Loss of the "I" (the ego, the self) leads to fuller integration into the greater "I" (which is ultimately union with all, with the divine, with God). This is the pattern of life, repeated daily, even… Continue reading
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The Garden of Pain
Poet and author John O'Donahue describes our suffering as time in the "garden of pain," a place in which our time is "not wasted or for naught." This interior space of pain is not the wasteland we typically imagine, not… Continue reading
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When Someone You Love Is Gone
When someone you love is gone, either because of the loss of relationship, distance or death, all of what was between you and that person (or other being, like a pet) has no place to go–the affection, for example, or… Continue reading